Coercion of the Corpus, Cake Mixing the Mind

I was reading Warren Ellis today about music and musical knowledge, about being the Beatles, about being Phil Spector. Last night I was walking home from a pointless trek in the cold (I went out, knew I wouldn't stay out, knew I couldn't drink, but went out anyway) thinking of selling all my synths and effects and patch cords and software and whatever because there just aren't enough hours in the day to be musically creative and to read, to just get off one's ass and head out onto the street. I thought I was just an enthusiast. But that "Mind Gangsterism" Ellis talks about is the thing I think I could really put my finger on if I just sat down with the chance to do it. How do you do it when you have school, friends, and this shit that just stares at you telling you you should be using it if you have it? I guess you stop drinking.